Let's Talk BBQ
General => General Discussion & Topics => General Discussion => Topic started by: smokeasaurus on November 15, 2014, 07:30:29 PM
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As if it wasn't bad enough losing Mama 74 days ago......now we lost our Dad. Wasn't feeling good about 2 weeks ago. Thought he had a stomach flu. My kids took him to emergency and he was suffering mild kidney failure due to dehydration. They got that fixed and he was almost discharged and that night he vomited and it entered his lungs.........he made it another week.............it was devastating to see my hero take his last breath............
I aint getting over this anytime soon.................. :'( :'(
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Sorry for you loss .
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My deepest sympathy. There is nothing that can be said to ease your pain. Only time can heal and that will take a while. I will pray that the Lord will speed the time it takes for the pain of grief to become the warmth of memories.
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I'm so sorry to hear this..it's tough when both your parents are gone and so close together. Only time will help heal your grief. Wishing you all the time you need. Pam .☆´¯`•.¸¸. ི♥ྀ.
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So very sorry to hear of your loss Smoke. You have our deepest sympathy. Thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family in this very difficult time. Hang in there friend we are thinking of you!
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Smoke I am truly sorry for your loss, especially so close in time to losing your Mom.
I am glad you have Wendy to help prop you up during this time. I too will be praying for you and your family!
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Oh man, that really sucks. I am really sorry for your loss.
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Smoke I am so sorry...
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My condolences Smoke.
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Sorry for your loss...our prayers are with y'all.
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I know what it is to lose both parents, but I can't imagine the pain of losing them so close together. My prayers are going out to you and your family. There are no words that can lessen your pain. Dee
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Sorry to hear that Smoke. I know your feeling. Don
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Sorry to hear of your loss. You and your family are in out prayers.
Art
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Sorry for your loss, prayers are with you
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I am really sorry to hear this Scott. Our prayers are with you and Wendy.
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My condolences to your family, may he RIP with the loved ones that have gone before him.
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I have been through this and I feel your pain, but it does help to do a mind rewind and think about all of the good memories of you and your Pop. It takes time.
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I am so sorry for your loss, smoke. I lost my pops nearly 3 decades ago and I remember it as if it was today, but time does heal the hurt - just takes lots of it. Lost him two weeks before the birth of my first son - his first grandson. He had purchased a Krugerand for my wife to celebrate his birth - never got the chance to give it to her.
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I am really sorry smoke. :(
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Words are gone in a second, but memories last a lifetime. Lifetimes are but a second of eternity, too, so pain is real but fleeting. Remember all the good times and be faithful to be rejoined in eternity. Thoughts and prayers are with you . . .
Hub
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Sorry for your loss smoke.
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So sorry to hear about your Dad Scott.
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Sorry to hear you lost both parents so close together. We will keep you and the family in our thoughts and prayers.
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smoke, prayers for you and your family.
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So sorry....you have my sympathy
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So sorry to hear Smoke.
You have had a rough year and this just adds to it. Kimmie and I will keep y'all in our thoughts and prayers
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Condolences, you and your family will be in our thoughts and prayers.
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Our condolences and prayers to you and your family
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So sorry for your additional loss. Can't imagine the pain you are having. My dad has been gone for over 30 yrs, my mom 17. Think of both of them daily, remembering good times (and a few not so good). I know they loved me and that is comforting. My God be with you and keep you strong as you grieve. It gets easier, but you never forget them.
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So sorry to hear Smoke. You will be in my families thoughts.
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I would like to take this chance to thank each and everyone of you for all your kind thoughts. I have read them over and over and your responses have brought me some peace and comfort in this very difficult time.
Got to get back to the patio and Que.....Mom and Dad wouldn't have it any other way..........
which reminds me:
My Dad loves the Portable Kitchen aluminum grill that my neighbor has. We were gonna get him one cause he really liked the retro look. If anyone knows of one that might be for sale before I grab a new one, I would really appreciate it, gotta still get the grill for Pops..............
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Smoke - I just saw this. My heart breaks for you. You and your bride are in my prayers.
I am going out to ND to spend Thanksgiving with my Dad - he has basically quit living since my mom died. I empathize with your loss.
I wish you the best and thank you for your comments as I deal with my own demons.
I look forward to trading some great recipes with you soon!
D
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Oh Smoke, what a blow... You guys will be in our thoughts/prayers as you're grieving.
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Smoke - I just saw this. My heart breaks for you. You and your bride are in my prayers.
I am going out to ND to spend Thanksgiving with my Dad - he has basically quit living since my mom died. I empathize with your loss.
I wish you the best and thank you for your comments as I deal with my own demons.
I look forward to trading some great recipes with you soon!
D
I wish you all the best David. My Dad's heart was broken and he just did not have the will or strength or desire to fight his illness. It is going to be a very quiet Holiday Season around my house this year....mostly reflecting on happier times..that will be my gift to myself this year........
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Sorry for your loss. You will be in our prayers at out turkey table.
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Smoke - I just saw this. My heart breaks for you. You and your bride are in my prayers.
I am going out to ND to spend Thanksgiving with my Dad - he has basically quit living since my mom died. I empathize with your loss.
I wish you the best and thank you for your comments as I deal with my own demons.
I look forward to trading some great recipes with you soon!
D
Smoke, my thoughts and prayers are with you now and for this season. Christmas has been hard for me for many years. But I found a new song that is my Christmas song. I hope this means something to you as well.
http://fascinately.com/feel-good/2014/11/incredible-performance-of-mary-did-you-know-will-get-you-in-christmas-spirit/
My very best to you,
David
I wish you all the best David. My Dad's heart was broken and he just did not have the will or strength or desire to fight his illness. It is going to be a very quiet Holiday Season around my house this year....mostly reflecting on happier times..that will be my gift to myself this year........
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One of the things Smoke posted I think we need to look at very closely. If you have a loved one that is getting on up in years and you want to do something for them they you think they will like, such as the grill Smoke mentioned, don't wait for a special time such as Christmas or birthday. Do it now! They may not be around for that special time. Afterall, we give because we think the loved one deserves and would like/enjoy whatever it is and just use the special occasion as the time to do it. To someone of our loved ones...just the sun coming up today is a special occasion.
Love them while they are here.
Dee
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One of the things Smoke posted I think we need to look at very closely. If you have a loved one that is getting on up in years and you want to do something for them they you think they will like, such as the grill Smoke mentioned, don't wait for a special time such as Christmas or birthday. Do it now! They may not be around for that special time. Afterall, we give because we think the loved one deserves and would like/enjoy whatever it is and just use the special occasion as the time to do it. To someone of our loved ones...just the sun coming up today is a special occasion.
Love them while they are here.
Dee
Thank you for that observation, Dee. You are so right.
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You are so right Dee. I lost my wife after she battled cancer for over 6 years. We had plenty of time to say goodbye and while it was extremely hard, there was nothing left unsaid. I lost my Mom almost 2 years later and that was a phone call telling me she was killed in a boating accident. I did not get to say goodbye or to prepare. My Dad is 95 and living in the VA nursing home. The dementia has taken him away a little bit at a time over the last several years. He doesn't know who I am anymore and most days doesn't know where he is or why. Even though my Dad is not really still in that shell I dread the day I lose him forever.
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There is no easy goodbye to those we love. The shock of the first loved one to pass is terrible, but it does not ever get easier. Tell the people that you love, that you love them, often, it may be your last opportunity!
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Smoke you got my deepest sympathy.
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There is no easy goodbye to those we love. The shock of the first loved one to pass is terrible, but it does not ever get easier. Tell the people that you love, that you love them, often, it may be your last opportunity!
Gene, you are so right. I have had the experience of the instant death - a suicide and the lingering death - my mom with leukemia... neither are good or easy... I pray for everyone facing this.
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Smoke, I am so sorry for your loss. My parents have just turned 80 and I am so worried that when one of them passes, my family will go through exactly what your family is now going through.
I will keep all of you in my prayers.
BD
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We had a double funeral yesterday for Pops and Mama. It was a nice simple service and we had a nice reception at my brothers house. My Pops to remaining brothers were there. My Dad was the youngest of all the boys and the two remaining is 92 and 89 years of age. Looks like old smoke comes from good stock.
Driving back to the mountain yesterday I observed I didn't feel near as bad as I thought I would. It was nice to see long lost family members and I got to talk to my older sister for the first time (Pops had her before he met our Mama).
Below is a link to a photo my sister in law took at the ceremony
I guess you can mourn and heal at the same time.............
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10205031209279372&set=a.4651789532188.2188891.1216740183&type=1&theater
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As sad as funeral services can be there is comfort in family and friends getting together and remembering all the good things and good times. It does help ease the pain.
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My brother found this picture of our parents back in the day.....I just can't believe they both left us so fast........sorry for being such a downer these days.....
(http://i1213.photobucket.com/albums/cc469/s1cott11/10426162_10205058663445709_8611577697834735349_n_zpse9cf671a.jpg) (http://s1213.photobucket.com/user/s1cott11/media/10426162_10205058663445709_8611577697834735349_n_zpse9cf671a.jpg.html)
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Look how pretty your mom and dad was. I remember my gma wearing dresses like that. Smoke..it does get better but it takes some time. It will be alright...later..hang in. Pam .☆´¯`•.¸¸. ི♥ྀ.
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........sorry for being such a downer these days.....
Not a downer... I'm pleased that you share your family and wonderful memories with us
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That's a very nice photo of your mom and dad Smoke! They look like they're having a fine time and are very happy!
And now that they are together again, I'm sure they will be forever happy!
Smoke no apologies for how you feel. You have been thru a lot recently. And we're all friends, so amigo if you're sad, we're sad with you! ;)
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That's a very nice photo of your mom and dad Smoke! They look like they're having a fine time and are very happy!
And now that they are together again, I'm sure they will be forever happy!
Smoke no apologies for how you feel. You have been thru a lot recently. And we're all friends, so amigo if you're sad, we're sad with you! ;)
X2
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Smoke - You hang in there buddy. We are here for you, and I hope you know that is true.
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Great picture Smoke! They look very elegant. Hang in there and remember the good times.
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Smoke I just lost a good friend last month to cancer. He was actually my ex father-in-law from my first marriage and we still stayed close even after his daughter and I divorced. He and his wife even participated in my wedding with my current wife. I met him when I was 20 years old and I am now 39.
It was really tough watching him die. The cancer took him in 8 months from diagnosis to death. He was missing a gene that most people have that will battle the cancer he had so his body just let the cancer take over.
It has been real tough because honestly this guy was 10 times a father to me than my real father.
Sounds like you and your pops were real close and he sounds like he was a great man.
And your not being a downer. I understand how you feel. It has been a month and I have been in a better mood but I still think about him everyday. Things will get better over time. And you have the support of your new wife and beautiful scenery at your new home to help you through it...
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I have been offered counseling two times through hospice and I have turned them down.
All I need is Beer, Kingsford and all of you :-* :-* :-* :-*
Wendy and I thank you from the bottoms of our hearts
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smoke, we're here for you, buddy.
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I have been offered counseling two times through hospice and I have turned them down.
All I need is Beer, Kingsford and all of you :-* :-* :-* :-*
Wendy and I thank you from the bottoms of our hearts
That's the way to do it. You'll never see a BBQ pit and a keg at a therapist office, because all their clients would be cured and their business would dry up. 8)
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That is a beautiful picture of two very happy and pretty people. We all know your pain, but hang in there. Sometimes it is hardest during the Holidays, but the memories are great and helpful.