This will most likely be in the September Bull Sheet, but for the competitors here (or those interested) I'm posting it early. The new scoring system is very interesting!
Humility – A Side Dish With Contest Barbeque!
“. . .the numbers start at the tips of judges’ pencils”
By
Gordon Hubbell
This article is actually for judges, although I suspect most cooks will appreciate it, too. Many judges only cook once in their barbeque careers and some may never cook at all, but there are quite a number of us who do both judging and cooking. Cooking, when it comes right down to it, is potentially one of the most humbling pursuits one can experience. To help judges understand this I’ll reference a recent contest where my partner and I (both judges, too) put in one of our best performances.
It is said that a doctor who treats himself has a fool for a patient and I go along with that. It could also be said that a barbeque cook who judges his own entry falls into the same classification. However, we can’t help it. You cannot “not do it” and be human. After years and years of delving into the stuff cooks put in little white turn-in boxes, I’ve developed quite a feel for what is positive and negative, what is legal and illegal, and what is considered “contest” style and quality and what isn’t when it comes to chicken, ribs, pork and brisket. It comes with the territory. As a cook I can not only replicate those entries based on my own experimentation and testing, but also because I’ve paid to attend some competition cooking classes (paying both money and close attention).
Now, the humility part. “Judging” our entries at that contest, my partner and I tried to be cautious, conservative and honest about them. The chicken, ribs and pork “sang” to us. The meat was gorgeous, tasty, and had just the right texture and mouth feel. Brisket, even though we cooked two, just didn’t play properly that day. One was fairly moist but didn’t pull well and one was nice and tender but a little dry. We had to compromise on that entry but it had great appearance and the flavor was excellent. So, we wound up with what we thought were three extremely strong entries and one pretty darned decent one. On a good day there should have been a good chance of a walk or two, and on a bad day we figured we’d wind up in the middle of the pack (a position we are very familiar with).
It was not a good day. It wasn’t even a bad day. It was a day that will live in infamy for our team. The thunder and the rain streaming from the sky was an omen of things to come. The angels cried. Of 78 pro teams entered, we topped out with our chicken entry, finishing 30th (at least that’s well into the top half). Our ribs landed at 64th, and our pork and brisket were both 68th for their respective categories. Several days have passed now and I am no longer suicidal. I considered psychotherapy but that cost too much so, even though it is summertime, I just jumped into bed, assumed a fetal position, and turned the electric blanket up to ten. I’m still emotionally scarred, but I have recovered my power of speech.
This is the point in the story where every cook who is reading this will assume a knowing grin. Every cook has had days like this. Even cooks on teams who regularly take walks, win categories and even wind up as Grand Champions have had such days. It is a fact of barbeque contest life. But, why does it have to hurt so much? Why does it have to happen? I’ve decided it had to happen to my team so I could be inspired to write this article to help judges understand how important their job is and maybe even decide they should take another stab at cooking in order to better “feel” their impact on our endeavors. Competition barbeque is a numbers game and it teaches humility. The numbers start at the tip of judges’ pencils.
The “new” scoring system was in use for this contest and the amount of information provided back to the teams is almost overwhelming and most thought-provoking. To keep this short, Ill not go into the math (that might be another article someday, though). I’ll summarize by stating that, going through all the information, our entries landed at the tables which produced the lowest scores overall for all entries they judged that day. Further, the entries of many teams who walked (finished in the top ten in any category) and for the Grand Champion, landed at the highest scoring tables for the day.
This is not an exercise in “sour grapes”. Far from it. The point is, cooks have known for years that it takes both high skill AND the luck factor to get walks and win. Part of “luck” is getting your boxes on the right table. That hasn’t changed and, likely, never will. It is now, however, possible to see the “luck” dynamic in action via the scoring reports.
All things are arguable, at least to some extent. It could be argued that our entries were bad and just further lowered the scoring performance of the tables they graced. While that is possible (but not probable), I don’t think it would account for anywhere near 100% of the reason for the low scoring at those tables. Randomness in team/table assignment precludes that. There is always subjectivity and human performance, though. Fact – unless “judging” is fully quantified and done by computers, there will be room for random events and anomalies in scoring. Worse, if judging were done by computers and food qualities fully quantifiable, there would be no barbeque contests. Think about it.
Moral of this story . . . Judges: Focus. Teams have spent a lot of time and money to get their food in front of you. If you don’t concentrate and give plausible, honest scores you’re throwing their money away. Cooks: There’s always next weekend!
