Author Topic: Wordplay....  (Read 597 times)

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Offline teesquare

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Wordplay....
« Reply #-1 on: June 06, 2013, 05:46:32 PM »
Lexiphile: (i.e., "lovers of words" you know . . . . like . . . you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish . . ..
or, I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger . . . . then it hit me . . . .etc.).
Well, here are a few more:
I have to admit that this stuff amuses me.


To write with a broken pencil is . . . pointless.

When fish are in schools they sometimes . . . take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar . . . got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , . . . U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes . . . was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out . . . free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. .. . . They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a . . . dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist . . . you can get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name . .. . and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you . . . A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if . . . you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia : . . . The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is . . . hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping center . . . you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . .. resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? . . . He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could . . . jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone; . . .. it is two tired.

In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, . . . it's your Count that votes.

When a clock is hungry . . .. it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine . . . was fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory . . . which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be . . . exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, . . . she thought she'd dye.
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Offline deestafford

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Re: Wordplay....
« on: June 06, 2013, 05:55:50 PM »
If the truth be known, I'd bet the Turtle originated about 50% of those.  Dee
This post may contain misspellings, grammatical errors, disorganized sentence structure, misquotes, and lack a coherent theme.  These elements are natural to the process of writing, and will only add to the beauty of the post.

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Offline muebe

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Re: Wordplay....
« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2013, 05:58:08 PM »
 :D
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Offline muebe

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Re: Wordplay....
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2013, 06:12:54 PM »
I just thought of one I think...

Hear about that skydiver who started a new job at Starbucks.... He hit the ground running.
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Offline RAD

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Re: Wordplay....
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2013, 06:30:02 PM »
not mine but it fits...


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