Author Topic: Morris Schwartz  (Read 921 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline smokeasaurus

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 16854
Morris Schwartz
« Reply #-1 on: October 07, 2013, 03:20:22 PM »


               Morris Schwartz is on his deathbed.  He is with his nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, and knows the end is near.   So he
says to them:
                "Bernie, I want you to take the Beverly Hills houses."
                "Sybil, take the apartments over in Los Angeles Plaza."
                "Hymie, I want you to take the offices over in City Center."
                "Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings                downtown"

                The nurse is just blown away by all this, and as Morris slips away, she says to the wife, "Mrs. Schwartz, your husband must have
been such a hardworking man to have accumulated all this property."

                Sarah replies, "Property? ...The schmuck had a lawn care business."
Got Smoke?

Keveri H1 Charcoal oven

Joined 12-5-11   Member# 32

Offline sliding_billy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10565
  • North Texas
Re: Morris Schwartz
« on: October 07, 2013, 03:22:25 PM »
Good one Smoke.
Custom Offset/GMG Davy Crockett/Vision Kamado/Blackstone 36"/Weber 22" "redhead"/ WSM 14.5" X2/Jumbo Joe/Pit Boss Copperhead/KCBS

Offline drholly

  • Member No Longer With Us
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10158
  • Brooklyn Park, MN
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #1 on: October 07, 2013, 03:27:17 PM »
That's funny!  ;D ;D ;D
You can't catch a fish if you don't get a line wet...
Pit Barrel Cooker, Char Broil Electric Smoker, Charbroil Prototype Kettleman, Char Broil 500X, Blackstone Flat Top, Char-Broil SRG, Weber Performer, ANOVA sous vide device, Lodge Hibachi, Discada, Chimenea, fire pit, hunk of pink salt...
Member #

Offline pz

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3039
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #2 on: October 07, 2013, 06:03:53 PM »
 :o ;D

Offline CDN Smoker

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5297
  • Manitoba, Canada
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #3 on: October 07, 2013, 06:56:01 PM »
 ;D :D  :D
"GO JETS GO"

MAK 2 Star #1351
Traeger Model BBQ 124, # 1106

Nothing has really happened until it has been recorded. – Virginia Woolf (Usually misquoted as “no pictures, didn’t happen”)

Any mistakes in my writing is by Apple and I am tired of fighting with him as to who is correct.

Offline HighOnSmoke

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 9887
  • Palm Bay, Florida
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #4 on: October 07, 2013, 07:32:06 PM »
 :D :D :D ;D
Mike

Auto Akorn Kamado
Recteq Stampede
Recteq Bullseye 380X
Weber Master Touch
PK Original Grill
Weber Jumbo Joe
Weber Smokey Joe
Green Mountain Grill Pizza Insert
Blackstone 36" and 22" griddles

Offline Jaxon

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3467
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #5 on: October 07, 2013, 07:56:01 PM »
Hymie, the lawyer, married a Japanese girl after this.

They had a daughter they named "Sosumi"
<><
You're at the top of the food chain...eat like it!

Offline teesquare

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11911
  • Brevard NC - Home Of Hillbilly Caviar
    • Savor Spices
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #6 on: October 07, 2013, 08:08:25 PM »
Hymie, the lawyer, married a Japanese girl after this.

They had a daughter they named "Sosumi"

O.k....you started it....

So, What's the difference in a Jew and a canoe?

At least the canoe tips......
BBQ is neither verb or noun. It is an experience.
Fine Swine and Bovine BBQ Team - Home of squeal and veal!
Beer, Butter and Bacon make everything better.
PBC
PBC Jr.
MAK 2 Star General #639
MAK 2 Star General #4401

Offline smokeasaurus

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 16854
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #7 on: October 07, 2013, 08:44:42 PM »
Oh, how I wonder where this thread is heading.............. ;)
Got Smoke?

Keveri H1 Charcoal oven

Joined 12-5-11   Member# 32

Offline hikerman

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6662
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #8 on: October 07, 2013, 08:47:00 PM »
Hymie, the lawyer, married a Japanese girl after this.

They had a daughter they named "Sosumi"

O.k....you started it....

So, What's the difference in a Jew and a canoe?

At least the canoe tips......
We NEED a rimshot sound effect here!

Offline teesquare

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11911
  • Brevard NC - Home Of Hillbilly Caviar
    • Savor Spices
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #9 on: October 07, 2013, 09:21:51 PM »
Wellllll.....a little self-depricating humor is the best kind sometimes... :D
BBQ is neither verb or noun. It is an experience.
Fine Swine and Bovine BBQ Team - Home of squeal and veal!
Beer, Butter and Bacon make everything better.
PBC
PBC Jr.
MAK 2 Star General #639
MAK 2 Star General #4401

Offline pz

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3039
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #10 on: October 07, 2013, 10:00:01 PM »

Offline teesquare

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11911
  • Brevard NC - Home Of Hillbilly Caviar
    • Savor Spices
Re: Morris Schwartz
« Reply #11 on: October 07, 2013, 10:05:41 PM »
I'll be here all week! Tip your waitress! :D
BBQ is neither verb or noun. It is an experience.
Fine Swine and Bovine BBQ Team - Home of squeal and veal!
Beer, Butter and Bacon make everything better.
PBC
PBC Jr.
MAK 2 Star General #639
MAK 2 Star General #4401