Never squat with yer spurs on.
There's two theories to arguin' with a woman;
neither one works.
Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew,
your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence,
try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
Good judgment comes from experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd,
take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in.
Finally,
never miss a good chance to shut up.
